Share and Share Alike?

OK, Mommy delimma...

When do you make your children share? and when do you let them possess things?

So far, the only thing I don't make the girls share is Zoë's duck blanket and Megan's giraffe. Ironically, they have been more inclined to share these special "lovie" items than I thought they would. I have found Megan sharing Giraffe with Miranda quite a bit.

So, this morning, Megan had a little box of books that Zoë got for her birthday from her Dad. It's a set of Strawberry Shortcake stories, and Megan is definitely into the little doll things (Polly Pockets, Princess Pockets, Strawberry Shortcake, etc.) She was carrying it around and was sweet enough to bring it to me to ask if she could read/look at them. I, of course, immediately said "Sure!" (I always love it that my girls want to read). Then Zoë realizes what Megan has and says, "Those are mine! You can't read them. Dad got them for me for my birthday!"

I posit to you: what do you do? Force the older one to share with the younger one, never letting the older have her own space/possession? Make the younger share with her? When do you let a child be able to choose not to share something special to them?

Oh, and even though Megan had the books, Zoë was NOT allowed to take them out of her hands. That is a hard and fast rule in our house: No grabbing out of somebody's hands!